The Lobster: The Original Day-Ruiner

Yesterday I was terribly sick – stuck on (to?) the sofa and barely able to hit play on Amazon Prime Movies – so I decided it was a good day to watch the dystopian black comedy The Lobster. In case you missed it, the basic premise is that singles in the City must couple up or risk being turned into an animal. Our male lead chooses a lobster as his potential future self. This after his brother is made a dog when he fails to find love.

Fair warning: The dog later gets beaten to death off screen. I give you warning this because nobody gave it to me. You’re welcome.

I could not have been more wrong in making this movie choice. There is no good day to watch this movie. It is one of the the most miserable films I have ever seen sucking the happy from you like a syringe. It is also deeply odd and incredibly original – so much so I found myself unable to stop watching it until Colin Farrell goes to gouge his eyes out so he can be with his blinded love, Rachel Weiss. And by then it was much too late.

Really, really short review: People call it a beautiful, bizarre dark comedy and that is true for them, perhaps. For me it was a miserable two hours I would desperately love to have back. And I’d be an otter.

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